CHAZ BONO (narrates): While waiting for the traffic light to change to green, I sometimes honk my horn at other vehicles. it's funny when they jump out of fright. My chums honk their horns at attractive girls..You should try it!
(DRIVE RADIO plays Pink's RESPECT "When me and all my girls go walking down the street, It seems we can't go anywhere without a car that goes "Beep-beep" )
Girl,daryl hannah, bent to fetch her purse that fell on the road. ARGH honks horn. She looks up. ARGH gives her thumbs-up
GIRL:
I don't understand. What are you trying to say?
ARGH:
Looking so gorgeous!
GIRL:
DO NOT not honk your horn at me. This is totally unacceptable where I'm from in Chichen Itza
ARGH:
(laughs) You're standing in the road. We pay to drive on the road, if you know what I mean. I don't give a damn where you from. Honking is cool in Sons of Anarchy
GIRL:
It pisses me off
ARGH:
This is good for self esteem. You are NO Annie Lennox, so humble yourself and be thankful for whatever honking come your way
GIRL:
LOOK! I need no boost in my self esteem from the LIKES OF YOU. I already know I am gorgeous. How would your woman feel if she knows you're beeping other women on the road or how would you feel when other guys honk at your woman?
ARGH:
It does'nt bother me at all. To be honest, DTS would not be happy but that's her problem. Not mine or yours... I like the way you're checking me out right now while showing me bad vibes
GIRL:
Dream on! This is not Paradise Lost.
ARGH:
The only person dreaming is you. I honk my horn so that dog could get out of the way. I did'nt even see you. Where did you appear from?
GIRL:
Are you sure you were not honking at me...I get thist all the time. I'm NEVER short of attention
ARGH:
ATTENTION SEEKER! If I see you THE NEXT TIME, I wont honk again, i'll just run you over
GIRL:
Sour grapes..PERVERT!!!!!!!(angrily marches up to the car, ARGH quickly winds up the window, locks the door then speeds off)
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UGH:
(honking horn) SENORITA!
WOMAN turns up her car stereo and ignores him.
UGH:
HOW RUDE!
WOMAN:
I'm not a prostitute, you know so S T O P ! Leave me alone. I am certain you would'nt like your wife and kids to hear this
UGH:
I'm driving this car for the first time. I beeped a girl at the traffic lights up the road. She waved and blew me a kiss. She was a decent and respectable person who is just happy for my success. Obviously, you're a different kettle of fish
WOMAN:
Before you honk or yell at me as you drive past again, make sure you're driving a DECENT AND RESPECTABLE car. By the way, you're old, fat and ugly...Thanks for noticing that I'm a DIFFERENT kettle of fish
UGH:
You have no class! No need to be rude, I just wanted to let you know that you forget to take the money you withdrew from the cash machine
///////////////////////////////////////////////
GIRL:
PerverT! how would you like it if random strangers honk at your daughter? STOP embarrassing yourself. I'M NOT INTERESTED!
GRRR:
I'll slash your tyres, DON'T MESS with me!
WOMAN: I know I'm irresistible but your attention DOES NOT appeal to me, and I am not scared of you either
GRRR: If looks could kill
WOMAN: I'm making sure I give you a good look before...(she screams)
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