Traffic in all directions halts at busy intersection. Out of order traffic lights continues to flash RED. Drivers look pretty bemused, angry and frustrated because no one knows whose turn it is to GO.
UGH:
CHRIST! WALE! This could go on for HOURS. Good thing I had some Starbucks before I left the house
Suddenly the light turns to green in UGH’s lane.
GRRR:
HURRAH!
In less than 30 seconds it changes to YELLOW
ARGH:
FUDGE! FUDGE! You cheered too soon GRRR! It’s your fricking fault.
Motorists in other lanes start to GO even though the red light was still flashing.
GRR:
I KNEW THIS WAS GOING TO HAPPEN! Where the FUDGE do you lot think you’re going? Wait till it’s your turn. ARGH!!!!!
MOTORIST:
Okay, so whose turn is it now? What's your problem, you fugging AMOEBA!!!!!
Showing posts with label Rage at the traffic light. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rage at the traffic light. Show all posts
Wednesday, 17 August 2011
Sunday, 7 August 2011
road sideshow
Sidewalk vendor:Enjoy it. So you going home now?
**: No! Not ready yet. The stock market today is too depressing. I'm just gonna sit in the car, rev the engine and honk the horn repeatedly
Sidewalk Vendor: No need to be rude, the traffic will clear soon
**: I wont be rude, I'm just gonna pretend
Sidewalk Vendor: Motorists will think you wanna move the car forward so jump out of the way fast. That could cause confusion and accidents.
** (laughs) I just wanna see the look on their faces when they realize that I'm not moving the car at all
What happens if the car in front of you takes too long to move?
I will just honk my horn louder and rev the engine harder
http://www.facebook.com/allthatrage
**: No! Not ready yet. The stock market today is too depressing. I'm just gonna sit in the car, rev the engine and honk the horn repeatedly
Sidewalk Vendor: No need to be rude, the traffic will clear soon
**: I wont be rude, I'm just gonna pretend
Sidewalk Vendor: Motorists will think you wanna move the car forward so jump out of the way fast. That could cause confusion and accidents.
** (laughs) I just wanna see the look on their faces when they realize that I'm not moving the car at all
What happens if the car in front of you takes too long to move?
I will just honk my horn louder and rev the engine harder
http://www.facebook.com/allthatrage
Friday, 3 June 2011
Pedestrians' Rage at the traffic light
SCENE 6
Location - side-walk
Characters - Rage, Jogger and Drunk
Rage approaches green traffic light. The pedestrian in front of him cut his speed.
RAGE
You should be walking faster now! Are you trying to let the red light catch you? I'M NOT.
The light changes to red.
RAGE (fumes)
Fudge!
Rage is distracted by a spectacle at the traffic light. As a jogger waits for the light to change to green, she jogs on the spot. A drunk, occasionally sipping from a can, mimics her.
She yells at him.
JOGGER
Retard!
The light is still on red when Rage reaches there. This seems like eternity. He did not want to stop or slow down. An idea pops into his head. Instead of halting, he walks around briskly - on the spot.
The jogger glances at both Rage and the drunk with disgust, rolled over her eyes then tries to turn her back to them.
RAGE
What’s your problem? You health-obsessed, EXERCISE FREAK!
Drunk cackles.
JOGGER
RetardS
DRUNK(to Rage)
She thinks she is too HEALTHY to associate with us in public.
RAGE
And you are?
DRUNK (excitedly)
My name is.....
RAGE
....I don’t wanna know. Fudge off!
Finally, the light changes to green. Jogger speeds away.
JOGGER
Bye losers!
RAGE
Meanwhile, both Rage and the drunk continue to do their thing. This made it possible for the other pedestrians to move off before them.
RAGE
FUDGE! Slow people are first off the block as usual. At their pace, the red light will catch me here again.
DRUNK (admonishes)
Don’t let them get to you
RAGE
You will get my fist if you hang around a little longer.....SLOW WALKERS
Rage rolls his eyes.
DRUNK (jogs away quickly)
Really rude!
Rage chases the drunk with a brisk walk. The other pedestrians scurry out of the way without being prompted.
Rage grabs the drunk by his shirt collar.
PEDESTRIAN (screams)
CALL THE POLICE!
The drunk spins around and splashes Rage’s face with whatever was in the can.
RAGE
You will never drink alone again, CHUM
*******************************************
Unfortunately, this was not the first example of bad manners stephen colbert have experienced from you. If you want to be accepted by the wider Colbert family I suggest you take some guidance from experts with utmost haste
Location - side-walk
Characters - Rage, Jogger and Drunk
Rage approaches green traffic light. The pedestrian in front of him cut his speed.
RAGE
You should be walking faster now! Are you trying to let the red light catch you? I'M NOT.
The light changes to red.
RAGE (fumes)
Fudge!
Rage is distracted by a spectacle at the traffic light. As a jogger waits for the light to change to green, she jogs on the spot. A drunk, occasionally sipping from a can, mimics her.
She yells at him.
JOGGER
Retard!
The light is still on red when Rage reaches there. This seems like eternity. He did not want to stop or slow down. An idea pops into his head. Instead of halting, he walks around briskly - on the spot.
The jogger glances at both Rage and the drunk with disgust, rolled over her eyes then tries to turn her back to them.
RAGE
What’s your problem? You health-obsessed, EXERCISE FREAK!
Drunk cackles.
JOGGER
RetardS
DRUNK(to Rage)
She thinks she is too HEALTHY to associate with us in public.
RAGE
And you are?
DRUNK (excitedly)
My name is.....
RAGE
....I don’t wanna know. Fudge off!
Finally, the light changes to green. Jogger speeds away.
JOGGER
Bye losers!
RAGE
Meanwhile, both Rage and the drunk continue to do their thing. This made it possible for the other pedestrians to move off before them.
RAGE
FUDGE! Slow people are first off the block as usual. At their pace, the red light will catch me here again.
DRUNK (admonishes)
Don’t let them get to you
RAGE
You will get my fist if you hang around a little longer.....SLOW WALKERS
Rage rolls his eyes.
DRUNK (jogs away quickly)
Really rude!
Rage chases the drunk with a brisk walk. The other pedestrians scurry out of the way without being prompted.
Rage grabs the drunk by his shirt collar.
PEDESTRIAN (screams)
CALL THE POLICE!
The drunk spins around and splashes Rage’s face with whatever was in the can.
RAGE
You will never drink alone again, CHUM
*******************************************
Unfortunately, this was not the first example of bad manners stephen colbert have experienced from you. If you want to be accepted by the wider Colbert family I suggest you take some guidance from experts with utmost haste
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