Burger King diners, including Nancy Shevell, peer through windows, in amazement as the breeze relentlessly chases orange and brown crunchy leaves down the sidewalk.
Ryan Howard
So much leaves on the sidewalk today? What's going on?
Janet Devlin
Duh! It's autumn, where do you expect to see them? On the trees?
Ryan Howard
Oh I see! Aren't they gonna block the drains?
Janet Devlin
Who cares! Autumn comes only once per year
CHILDREN jump in a heap of rustling leaves
Janet Devlin
I love the crunchy sounds under their feet
Ryan Howard
Sometimes it sounds like footsteps. But there is no greater feeling..it's wonderful!
Janet Devlin
OH NO!
Ryan Howard
What's the matter DRAMA QUEEN?
Janet Devlin
I think I stepped on a frog beneath this pile of leaves
Ryan Howard
You EVIL, HEARTLESS... Let me help you clear away the leaves so we can have a better look at it
Janet Devlin
Thanks
Ryan Howard(Laughs)
Wait! It's not a frog, you muppet! Its a rotten grapefruit
Janet Devlin (sighs in relief)
Thank you God
Janet Devlin
Look at this idiot with the leaf-blower!
Ryan Howard
He is not an idiot. He is blowing the leaves OFF the sidewalk
Janet Devlin
Yes, thats not bad. But he's blowing them into someone's yard
Ryan Howard
I think he's a smart-ass. He realizes his mistake, so he's now blowing them back to the sidewalk
Janet Devlin
IDIOT!
FALLiNG LEAVES HITS CYCLIST IN THE FACE. CYCLIST LOSES CONTROL CRASHES INTO ONCOMING CYCLIST WHO HAS A PASSENGER.
Ryan Howard and Janet Devlin try to stifle laughter as cyclists blame each other.
CYCLISTS SHOWS THEM MIDDLE FINGER AND HURL INSULTS
Janet Devlin
Lots of leaves in your hair
Ryan Howard
Lots of leaves
CYCLIST BRUSHES HAiR FRANTICALLY WITH BACK OF HIS HAND.
Cyclist
liars liars!
LAUGHTER
CYCLIST CURSES, SWEARS THEN RIDES OFF IN THE OPPOSIT DIRECTION
Ryan Howard (laughs)
He even forgets his own direction
Janet Devlin
Just another IDIOT
Janet Devlin
There are fallen leaves all over the sidewalk. Autumn is definitely here.
Ryan Howard
I think you said that earlier, but this time it sounds like you are reading a romance novel
Janet Devlin
OMG! This is my favourite time of the year! I can’t help but gush about it. I am especially obsessed with the browned, fallen leaves.
Ryan Howard
Mine also. Listen to the sound of dry leaves dancing and colliding on the sidewalk; no doubt about it AUTUMN IS HERE!
Janet Devlin
Hurrah! I Love autumn
They both stomp through pile of leaves heaped up by sweeper
SWEEPER:
I HATE AUTUMN! When it’s not the darn wind scattering the leaves I swept, its IDIOTS LIKE YOU. DO YOU MIND?
Ryan
I think you're just making a mess(giggle)
SWEEPER
YOU DON'T HAVE A CLUE. I have swept this area lots of times in the last hour but the damn trees keep letting go of their leaves
Ryan Howard
It's autumn, you MUPPET!
THEY KICK THROUGH OTHER PILES. Sweeper chases them with his broom and clenched fists
Janet Devlin
Let's collect the ones with the most beautiful colours
Ryan Howard
What for? You idiot! Don't have anything better to do?
Janet Devlin
The other girls will love them, don't YOU think?
Ryan Howard,
OH YES! Why didn't you say so earlier?
Janet Devlin
It's a pity we will not be able to capture the sound of the other leaves blowing along the sidewalk
Ryan Howard
Sorry Winsome. You win some, You lose some
.....................................
SIDEWALK THEATRE and SIDEWALK LOOKS http://www.facebook.com/allthaTRAGE
SIDEWALK LOOKS http://sidewalknarratives.blogspot.com/
Showing posts with label cyclist. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cyclist. Show all posts
Saturday, 8 October 2011
Tuesday, 16 August 2011
Nothing but drama ALL week
Jeremy Maclin, it felt great to return to work this week. As usual, I both walked and drove. What a week it's been! DAMN! It's been nothing but pure drama drama, drama, drama! Don't wonder what it would have been like without the pedestrians and motorists who supplied the OOMPH to my week, even though sometimes they made me scream and pull my hair out. I am delighted to share the week's highlights with you.
MONDAY
CHUM:
He says if you have something to say, say it to his face instead of honking your horn like a MAD MAN
Raging Bull:
Grrr!
Since there is sidewalk for cyclists, he should USE IT AND GET OFF THE DARN ROAD!!!!!!!
CHUM:
He called you a acn DONUT!
RB:
Only an IDIOT get lost EVERYDAY with maps and direction pointers and gps
CHUM:
You can't walk barefooted on the cold sidewalk. Why did you take off your shoes and threw it in the ditch?
Raging Bull:
No place in my shoe for you, you long legged fuher! No! You're DEAD! YOU SCUM OF THE EARTH. VERMIN! Do you have any spider poison in your manbag
Chum:
NO! Squash its skeleton with the shoe
TUESDAY
Chum:
If you could, it seem you would punch that driver. what's wrong?
Raging Bull: Grrr! He's driving too SLOW to be in the fast lane! The speed limit is 65 for heaven sake! Come on, MOVE OVER!
RAGING BULL:
Vehicle horns drive me crazy.
CHUM:
Motorists use them to show how rude they are to us pedestrians
RAGING BULL:
Such NUISANCE!!
CHUM:
I know. Mind you, the emergency sirens are no better
RAGING BULL:
True. But THEY SAVE LIVES.horns destroy lives AND RELATIONSHIPS. My husband hate horns so much, he cant stand hearing them on the radio
WEDNESDAY
Chum:
All That rage! Why are you showing NFLX your middle finger?
Raging Bull
SINCE he dislikes HOW I drive, I want him to get the HELL off the sidewalk!
Chum:
The truck driver said you're not fit to drive
Raging Bull:
Yes, I’M A ANGRY driver. Yes, rage, therapy might help, you wanna know what else would help??....IF HE COULD DRIVE!!.
THURSDAY
Chum:
nnamdi asomugha! I can't, these SLOW WALKERS taking up the WHOLE sidewalk....
Raging Bull:
...Me neither. For your information TURTLES, some of us have dogs to feed and uncles to have dinner with
Raging Bull:
Keep your seat belt on and be quiet!
Chum:
your highness, please don’t discriminate against me because I’m in the passenger seat. I want to reach over to honk the horn and swear at other drivers too. I'M BORED!
FRIDAY
Raging Bull:
mini driver swerve into me then DELIBERATLEY ran me off the road.
Chum: OMG! I had no idea one had to be so defensive even when driving a big bus.
Raging BUll:
Defend? By the time I realized what was happening, it was too late to DEFEND; I was on the sidewalk on my side, and he was GONE like carlos beltran
CHUM:
I stopped in the rain to fix one of my flip flops that broke. The other one fell off my feet and sailed down the sidewalk in the water. Could'nt catch it. Had to walk the rest of the way home BAREFOOT. Fudge!
Raging Bull:
What a TRAGEDY!
SATURDAY
Raging Bull:
(rants) TO HELL WITH ALL YOU pedestrians congesting the sidewalk. I wish your brains explode and scatter all over the sidewalk. I don't give damn!
Chum:
Take it easy. PLEASE!
RB:
honking at pensioners again?
C:
Any car that passes me on the shoulder is getting rammed.Blame my school for my anger!
RB:
I'm scared we'll bump into the lorry driver we threw the sprite cans on.
C:
He was mad like eagles.
RB:
His arms are bigger than our legs. Let's go straight home. If we see him on the way, we simply give a few hand signals
C:
Provided no kids are present
SUNDAY
CHUM:
one of these days a motorist is gonna punch you in the face
RAGING BULL:
progeria! If I knew he was gonna point a pistol in my face when I opened his car door, I would have stayed in the car with you and wait for the cops to arrive
CHUM:
For your birthday, I'm gonna get a bumper sticker that says 'OUT OF RAGE MEDICATION'
++ - I'm going to the sidewalk sale with my best looking grand niece
** - She will definitely see your crazy side IF you spot a bargain
++ - THERE WILL BE bargains!. Everything will be 75% off . TODAY ONLY!
** - TODAY ONLY? They said that yesterday.
++ - IT’S TRUE!
** - Well, hurry up before its all gone then. Don't let me hold you back dear.
MONDAY
CHUM:
He says if you have something to say, say it to his face instead of honking your horn like a MAD MAN
Raging Bull:
Grrr!
Since there is sidewalk for cyclists, he should USE IT AND GET OFF THE DARN ROAD!!!!!!!
CHUM:
He called you a acn DONUT!
RB:
Only an IDIOT get lost EVERYDAY with maps and direction pointers and gps
CHUM:
You can't walk barefooted on the cold sidewalk. Why did you take off your shoes and threw it in the ditch?
Raging Bull:
No place in my shoe for you, you long legged fuher! No! You're DEAD! YOU SCUM OF THE EARTH. VERMIN! Do you have any spider poison in your manbag
Chum:
NO! Squash its skeleton with the shoe
TUESDAY
Chum:
If you could, it seem you would punch that driver. what's wrong?
Raging Bull: Grrr! He's driving too SLOW to be in the fast lane! The speed limit is 65 for heaven sake! Come on, MOVE OVER!
RAGING BULL:
Vehicle horns drive me crazy.
CHUM:
Motorists use them to show how rude they are to us pedestrians
RAGING BULL:
Such NUISANCE!!
CHUM:
I know. Mind you, the emergency sirens are no better
RAGING BULL:
True. But THEY SAVE LIVES.horns destroy lives AND RELATIONSHIPS. My husband hate horns so much, he cant stand hearing them on the radio
WEDNESDAY
Chum:
All That rage! Why are you showing NFLX your middle finger?
Raging Bull
SINCE he dislikes HOW I drive, I want him to get the HELL off the sidewalk!
Chum:
The truck driver said you're not fit to drive
Raging Bull:
Yes, I’M A ANGRY driver. Yes, rage, therapy might help, you wanna know what else would help??....IF HE COULD DRIVE!!.
THURSDAY
Chum:
nnamdi asomugha! I can't, these SLOW WALKERS taking up the WHOLE sidewalk....
Raging Bull:
...Me neither. For your information TURTLES, some of us have dogs to feed and uncles to have dinner with
Raging Bull:
Keep your seat belt on and be quiet!
Chum:
your highness, please don’t discriminate against me because I’m in the passenger seat. I want to reach over to honk the horn and swear at other drivers too. I'M BORED!
FRIDAY
Raging Bull:
mini driver swerve into me then DELIBERATLEY ran me off the road.
Chum: OMG! I had no idea one had to be so defensive even when driving a big bus.
Raging BUll:
Defend? By the time I realized what was happening, it was too late to DEFEND; I was on the sidewalk on my side, and he was GONE like carlos beltran
CHUM:
I stopped in the rain to fix one of my flip flops that broke. The other one fell off my feet and sailed down the sidewalk in the water. Could'nt catch it. Had to walk the rest of the way home BAREFOOT. Fudge!
Raging Bull:
What a TRAGEDY!
SATURDAY
Raging Bull:
(rants) TO HELL WITH ALL YOU pedestrians congesting the sidewalk. I wish your brains explode and scatter all over the sidewalk. I don't give damn!
Chum:
Take it easy. PLEASE!
RB:
honking at pensioners again?
C:
Any car that passes me on the shoulder is getting rammed.Blame my school for my anger!
RB:
I'm scared we'll bump into the lorry driver we threw the sprite cans on.
C:
He was mad like eagles.
RB:
His arms are bigger than our legs. Let's go straight home. If we see him on the way, we simply give a few hand signals
C:
Provided no kids are present
SUNDAY
CHUM:
one of these days a motorist is gonna punch you in the face
RAGING BULL:
progeria! If I knew he was gonna point a pistol in my face when I opened his car door, I would have stayed in the car with you and wait for the cops to arrive
CHUM:
For your birthday, I'm gonna get a bumper sticker that says 'OUT OF RAGE MEDICATION'
++ - I'm going to the sidewalk sale with my best looking grand niece
** - She will definitely see your crazy side IF you spot a bargain
++ - THERE WILL BE bargains!. Everything will be 75% off . TODAY ONLY!
** - TODAY ONLY? They said that yesterday.
++ - IT’S TRUE!
** - Well, hurry up before its all gone then. Don't let me hold you back dear.
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