Friday 27 January 2012

EAVESDROPPER Vanna SENSES INTRIGUE AT BUS STOP

EAVESDROPPER Vanna WAS ABOUT TO WALK PASS THE BUS STOP BUT SENSES INTRIGUE.


SAJAK:(just arriving)

Have you seen any 'B' bus? sorry to bother you



Amy:(smiles)

It's fine. The last 2 buses were 'A' buses. God knows what machinations the 'B' bus operators have up their sleeves. Their system is so moribund. UGH!




SAJAK: (nods in agreement)

Have you noticed how hubristic they have become since they got a pay rise?



Amy:

what?




SAJAK:

NEVER MIND!




SAJAK STARTS TALKING TO HIMSELF. Amy TAKES FEW STEPS AWAY.




BUS APPROACHES




SAJAK:(runs to Amy's side)

I knew it would be another A bus. What happen to the damn B buses? Same thing happened yesterday. Everyday it makes me angrier and angrier. GRRR!




Amy SMILES AWKWARDLY AND LOOKS AWAY WHEN THEIR EYES MEET. EAVESDROPPER Vanna SMIRKS. He STOPS WALKING EVEN THOUGH HE HAS NO INTENTION OF TAKING A BUS.




SAJAK: (mutters to himself)

I HATE rain! (to Amy)Do you like waiting in the rain?




Amy SHAKES HEAD, THEN HURRIES TO THE BIN. SEARCHES HER POCKET DESPERATELY BUT FINDS NO RUBBISH.





ANOTHER BUS APPEARS IN THE DISTANCE. EAVESDROPPER Vanna PRAYS IT WILL BE ANOTHER 'A' BUS.



SAJAK:

Another 'A' bus? what the hell! I HATE my life, especially living in this town. GRRR!.




EAVESDROPPER Vanna TRIES TO DISGUISE HIS AMUSEMENT.



SAJAK notices A PASSENGER MAKING REPEATED TRIPS ON THE BUS FOR HER BAGS. EAVESDROPPER Vanna ESTIMATES TO BE 15.




SAJAK:(jumps on bus and picks up a bag)

I'd like to help you



NO ANSWER



SAJAK:(louder)

Would you like some help?





(barks) NO! GET YOUR DIRTY HANDS OFF MY POSSESSION..GET LOST!



SAJAK:

WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? YOU HUBRISTIC SON OF A BITCH!




DRIVER MAKES EYE CONTACT WITH EAVESDROPPER Vanna. THEY BOTH GRIN





DRIVER:

NEVER offer help to anyone in this town!



SAJAK: (hisses teeth)

You shut up! My monthly salary is five times yours.



DRIVER: you sound like a LOSER to me




CHEERS AND LAUGHTER



FINALLY, FINISHES TRANSPORTING HER BAGS TO THE SIDEWALK. EAVESDROPPER LOOKS AT WATCH. RUNNING A LITTLE LATE, BUT DECIDES TO WAIT AROUND A LITTLE LONGER TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT.



GRRRR!



EAVESDROPPER Vanna HISSES TEETH WHEN HE NOTICES 'A' BUS COMING.




SAJAK:

Come on driver. get this damn bus moving. You've been waiting here for almost 3 minutes now. DON'T PISS ME OFF TODAY.



Amy:

And will you close the DAMN door please? IT'S FREEZING!



(sits beside AMY) TELL HIM MY FRIEND.



Amy: (shouts)

GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME! I'm not your FRIEND. I regret speaking to you in the first place. Should never speak to strangers at bus stops. I don't even know you! take your solipsism elsewhere.


......................................................
SIDEWALK THEATRE and SIDEWALK LOOKS http://www.facebook.com/allthaTRAGE

SIDEWALK LOOKS http://sidewalknarratives.blogspot.com/

Thursday 12 January 2012

Marley EAVESDROPS ON MOTORIST CHAT ON New Year's resolution

MARTINEZ: (sighs frustratingly, changes gear)

I don't blame you if you excoriate me but I have to let you know, I'm one step behind in my New Year's resolution.

CHER:

...a very slow progress indeed. But I have no vitriotic remark to make because you're not the only one avoiding gyms NOW. They're so packed with new year's resolution fanatics. I'm sure they'll be empty in a few weeks. But I can't wait so long, so I've been going for brisks walks early mornings. You could join me.



MARTINEZ:

I HATE getting out of bed in the mornings. Even my dog refuses to walk me to the door that UNGODLY time of the day. UGH!


CHER: (giggles from the backseat)

Oh! You could walk in the evenings then



MARTINEZ: (lights up a cigarette)

TOO DARK; scares the living daylights out of me



CHER:

Well, you just have to do it during your hour-long lunch periods



MARTINEZ:

I tried that the other day. Too much temptations on my way back; Macdonalds, KFC, kebabs and other fast food shops. UGH!



CHER:

I can't help you then, sorry...Oh! I know. You could buy Zumba for the Wii, then do the sessions at home with your kids



MARTINEZ:

I hear the sessions are quite intense and I lack coordination...So I'm terrified my kids will record me then post it on youtube.



CHER:

You wont be embarrassed. I promise....Just do it when they're out. You don't have to get the movements right. As long as you're moving, nothing else matters. Plus, it's great fun. I started last week. my goal is to look better than the damn AVATAR instructors. I'm tired of looking like a catfish.




MARTINEZ:

I don't know if it will work for me. But well done on your effort and good luck with your goal.



CHER:

Thanks, but you can do it also.



MARTINEZ: (looks for parking space)

Okay. I'll do it. Then I'll show my kids how it's done...By the way, you don't look like a rotund catfish. I can see your hard work and determination is paying off.



CHER:(gets out of car)

GREAT! You're points ahead of them already.



MARTINEZ: (locks car door with keys)

May I borrow your WII Zumba Fitness DVD, for a month...I'd like to try it before I buy it



..........................................................
SIDEWALK THEATRE and SIDEWALK LOOKS http://www.facebook.com/allthaTRAGE

SIDEWALK LOOKS http://sidewalknarratives.blogspot.com/

Tuesday 3 January 2012

Sidewalk love

HOODED SIDEWALK PRESENTER, Angelo, WALKS SLOWER SO HE CAN EAVESDROP ON TWO PEDESTRIANS' CONVERSATION.


Caucus:

I like your BEATIFIC smile and how you look, you know.


Stacey:

Thanks




So where you walking to?



NOWHERE. Just looking for a sky show of the meteor shower tonight



What's the hell is that?



GIRL FROWNS


Why you so antisocial?



It's patently obvious I'm very ill...and you might be infected



I don't mind being infected by you....sharing is caring


NO ANSWER



Are you Bolivian?



Yes


Are you South American?


YES, I AM...Why is that so HARD to believe?



I like how you look, you know?



THROUGH CORNER OF HIS EYES, ANGELO NOTICES THE GIRL ABRUPTLY SLOWS HER PACE



Caucus:

Are you stopping here?



Stacey:

Yes




SIDEWALK PRESENTER STOPS. THE GIRL PASSES, CLOSELY FOLLOWED BY THE BOY



Stacey:(pointing to parked car on the road)


That's my dad waiting in the car...



Shall I say hello




He has a baseball bat in the car


...................................................
SIDEWALK THEATRE and SIDEWALK LOOKS http://www.facebook.com/allthaTRAGE

SIDEWALK LOOKS http://sidewalknarratives.blogspot.com/